"Come and knock on our door...we'll be waiting for you"....loved that tv show and pretty soon we'll be singing the same theme song in the Mack house. Because as crazy as you may think we are, #3 is on the way and will be here, God-willing, sometime around September 20th!
It's been a long road to get here and definitely not according to our plan, but you'd think by now that I'd learn that nothing goes according to my plan when it comes to planning for our children. God thinks he has this better plan. And you know what? He's right, His plan is way better than mine.
Back in November, we experienced another miscarriage.
Our third one.
You'd think we'd be pros by now with handling it, but it's heartbreaking even the third time around. The only thing that made it easier to take was tucking our boys in at night and knowing that even if it didn't happen that we are definitely blessed with what we have. To make things more emotional, my HCG levels wouldn't come down after the miscarriage and they were concerned that I was having a ectopic pregnancy (a pregnancy in my fallopian tubes) which can be fatal if it ruptures. This is all while Tonya (my sister) is in the hospital to have her mastectomy. It was a rough month for sure. Thankfully, after month my HCG levels came down to zero.
Having three miscarriages put me into a new level of "recurrent miscarriages". We met with a fertility specialist in January to help figure out what might be the cause of this miscarriages.We had a lot of questions and wanted answers before trying again.
Well, it was one of those moments where we had an appointment to see the fertility specialist on Tuesday but found out the weekend before we were already pregnant. Getting pregnant was never the issue, it has always been keeping the pregnancy. So I was so glad to see the specialist when I was newly pregnant because with all of my miscarriages, they have happened early in the pregnancy.
Once the specialist found out that we were pregnant, he put me on blood thinner injections and baby aspirin. He reassured me that if I have a certain condition that called antiphospholipid antibodies that the blood thinners could actually save the baby but if I didn't have the condition it wouldn't harm the baby.
Turns out that I do have that condition as well as another...lucky me! The first is that my antiphospholipid antibodies levels are borderline, meaning that my blood tends to clot easily which is why I'm on blood thinner injections in my stomach. I'm thankful to have something to help with this condition but with a black and blue bruised stomach, I'm hoping and praying that my levels somehow get better so that I don't have to continue these. The other condition I have is the MTHFR gene mutation. My body has a very hard time absorbing vitamin B and folic acid...two things vital to prevent birth defects. So now I'm on a mega dose of these two vitamins.
Of course, my first question to the doctor was, "Then how do we explain the boys?" And he couldn't. And when a doctor can't explain something, I like to call it a miracle. Of course we have always thought that about our boys but after finding this out, it's truly amazing that I was able to carry them both full term and have 8 lb. chubby babies. God is just winking at me every time I look into their blue eyes.
Although, it's not exactly exciting to hear that you have these health issues, it was relieving to finally have somewhat of an answer to why we kept miscarrying. We just kept hearing, "It happens to a lot of people and sometimes we can't explain why."
It's been frightening to share the news with people that we're pregnant. It's my neurotic, irrational side like if I somehow share it with someone that I'm jinxing it. It took 2 months to even share it with our own parents. Being out of the first trimester now makes me breathe just a little easier.
Being due in September was definitely not according to my plan especially since Nolan's birthday is six days later than my due date and making it through the triple digit heat being pregnant was absolutely NO fun with Nolan. I had ZERO ankles and when I took off my flip flops the indentation was still left. Oh and did I mention it's a terrible time of year to be out as a teacher? But I definitely feel that this baby was meant to be and it is what it is so we should just embrace it.
Justin's mom was in town back in February and it was my mom's birthday so we thought it was a great time to share the news.